Tuesday, February 24, 2015
Learning Organization Profile
Learning Organization Profile
Below is a list of statements. Read each one carefully, then decide the extent to which it actually applies to your organization by using the scale below:
- 4 = applies fully
- 3 = applies to a great extent
- 2 = applies to a moderate extent
- 1 = applies to little or no extent
Be honest with your answers as the goal is to identify where your organization is presently at so that you can make improvements.
Learning Dynamics: Individual, Group or Team, and Organization
- _______ We are encouraged and expected to manage our own learning and development.
- _______ People avoid distorting information and blocking communication channels, using such skills as active listening and effective feedback.
- _______ Individuals are trained and coached in learning how to learn.
- _______ Teams and individuals use the action learning process. (that is, they learn from careful reflection on problem situations, and then apply their new knowledge to future actions.)
- _______ People are able to think and act with a comprehensive, systems approach.
Organization Transformation: Vision, Culture, Strategy, and Structure
- _______ Top-level managers support the vision of a learning organization.
- _______ There is a climate that supports and recognizes the importance of learning.
- _______ We learn from failures as well as successes.
- _______ Learning opportunities are incorporated into operations and programs.
- _______ The organization is streamlined--with few management levels--to maximize communication and learning across all levels.
People Empowerment: Employee, Manager, Customer, and Community
- _______ We strive to develop an empowered workforce able to learn and perform.
- _______ Authority is decentralized and delegated.
- _______ Managers take on the roles of coaching, mentoring, and facilitating learning.
- _______ We actively share information with our customers to obtain their ideas to learn and improve services and products.
- _______ We participate in joint learning events with supplies, community groups, professional associations, and academic institutions.
Knowledge Management: Acquisition, Creation, Storage and Retrieval, and Transfer and Use
- _______ People monitor trends outside our organization by looking at what others do--for example, by benchmarking best practices, attending conferences, and examining published research.
- _______ People are trained in the skills of creative thinking and experimentation.
- _______ We often create demonstration projects to test new ways of developing a product or delivering a service.
- _______ Systems and structures exist to ensure that important knowledge is coded, stored, and made available to those who need and can use it.
- _______ We continue to develop new strategies and mechanisms for sharing learning throughout the organization.
Technology Application: Information Systems, Technology-Based Learning, and EPSS (Electronic Performance Support Systems)
- _______ Effective and efficient computer-based information systems help our organizational learning.
- _______ People have ready access to the information superhighway--for example, through local area networks, the Internet, ASTD Online, and so on.
- _______ Learning facilities such as training and conference rooms incorporate electronic multimedia support.
- _______ We support just-in-time learning with a system that integrates high-technology learning systems, coaching, and actual work into a seamless process.
- _______ Electronic Performance Support Systems (EPSS) enable us to learn and do our work better.
_______ Total (Maximum Score 100)
Scoring
81 - 100: Congratulations! You are well on your way to becoming a learning organization!
61 - 80: Keep on moving! Your organization has a solid learning foundation.
40 - 60: A good beginning. Your organization has gathered some important building blocks to become a learning organization.
Below 40: Watch out! Time to make drastic changes if you want to survive in a rapidly changing world.
Thursday, February 19, 2015
Pembiayaan Islamik Yang Tidak Menindas
Selalunya pembeli rumah atau hartanah akan bertanyakan tentang pinjaman konvensional dan juga pembiayaan rumah secara islamik. Kedua-dua perkhidmatan mempunyai objektif yang sama iaitu memberikan perkhidmatan membayar rumah dan hartanah anda.
Namun demikian pembiayaan secara islamik akan menyatakan secara awal (up front) kadar keuntungan yang bakal di ambil oleh pihak perbankan dalam pembiayaan rumah anda. Mereka di pihak bank juga akan memaklumkan kadar BFR (base floating rate) iaitu keuntungan berubah dengan kadar siling sebanyak 10%.
Saya suka menyarankan bagi mereka yang beragama islam untuk mengambil pembiayaan rumah secara islamik. Untuk makluman anda, pembeli hartanah bukan islam juga sekarang lebih cenderung untuk memilih pembiayaan secara islamik kerana risiko yang rendah. Kadar siling telah di tetapkan sehingga 10%.
Pernah sesekali kadar faedah pinjaman kenvensional naik sehingga 12% pada ketika negara terkesan dengan krisis kewangan tahun 2008. Oleh itu kadar siling 10% mengurangkan beban terhadap pengguna untuk membuat pembayaran setiap bulan.
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
2 Jenis Bisnes Model Yang Disarankan Untuk Tambah Duit Poket Tahun 2015
Hidup makin terhimpit? terdesak harga barang makin naik? Gaji tak naik-naik? Bebanan keluarga semakin bertambah? Semakin hari semakin mencabar, dengan ekonomi negara yang tidak menentu.
Pasti anda tercari-cari peluang perniagaan atau side income untuk menambah pendapatan anda, yang pastinya anda tak mahu rugi. Bukan semua orang ada bakat dalam perniagaan. Orang berniaga dan berpengalaman juga rugi dalam bisnes. Ini fakta! Saya bukan sengaja mahu menakut-nakutkan anda, tapi ia realiti.
Salah satu cara untuk mengurangkan risiko anda dari terus rugi, dan membazir masa buat perkara yang sia-sia dalam menjalankan sesuatu bisnes adalah dengan mencari mentor atau ilmu yang betul dalam perniagaan.
Pemilihan bisnes model yang sesuai juga sangat penting supaya ia dapat mengurangkan risiko anda bertemu dengan kegagalan dalam bisnes pertama anda. Dalam artikel ini, saya akan berkongsi 2 bisnes model yang susuai untuk anda yang memang tiada modal sangat mahu berniaga.
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Four Steps to Measuring What Matters
When it comes to assessing performance, business executives can be a lot like old-time baseball scouts. They've been around so long that they've developed a gut feel for which statistics matter most.
When it comes to assessing performance, business executives can be a lot like old-time baseball scouts. They've been around so long that they've developed a gut feel for which statistics matter most.
But as Michael Lewis describes in Moneyball, the Oakland Athletics discovered that the metric the team's scouts used to choose players had nothing to do with whether those players would score runs. They had been measuring the wrong thing, and executives may be making the same mistake.
The statistics that companies use most often to track and communicate performance include financial measures such as sales and earnings per share growth. Yet these have only a flimsy connection to the objective of creating shareholder value. Executives cling to these metrics because they are overconfident in their intuition, they misattribute the causes of events, and they do not escape the pull of the status quo.
Useful statistics have two qualities. They are persistent, showing that the outcome of an action at one time will be similar to the outcome of the same action at a later time; and they are predictive, demonstrating a causal relationship between the action and the outcome being measured.
Choosing the right statistics — metrics that will allow you to understand, track, and manage the cause-and-effect relationships that determine the value of your company — is a four-step process. I'll illustrate the process in a simplified way using a fictional retail bank based on an analysis of 115 banks by Venky Nagar of the University of Michigan and Madhav Rajan of Stanford. Leave aside, for the moment, which metrics you currently use or which ones Wall Street analysts or bankers say you should. Start with a blank slate and work through these four steps in sequence.
Step 1: Define your governing objective. A clear objective is essential to business success because it guides the allocation of capital. Creating economic value is a logical governing objective for a company that operates in a free market system. Companies may choose a different objective, such as maximizing the firm's longevity. We will assume that the retail bank seeks to create economic value.
Step 2: Develop a theory of cause and effect to assess presumed drivers of the objective. The three commonly cited financial drivers of value creation are sales, costs, and investments. More-specific financial drivers vary among companies and can include earnings growth, cash flow growth, and return on invested capital.
Naturally, financial metrics can't capture all value-creating activities. You also need to assess nonfinancial measures such as customer loyalty, customer satisfaction, and product quality, and determine if they can be directly linked to the financial measures that ultimately deliver value. As we've discussed, the link between value creation and financial and nonfinancial measures like these is variable and must be evaluated on a case-by-case basis.
In our example, the bank starts with the theory that customer satisfaction drives the use of bank services and that usage is the main driver of value. This theory links a nonfinancial and a financial driver. The bank then measures the correlations statistically to see if the theory is correct and determines that satisfied customers indeed use more services, allowing the bank to generate cash earnings growth and attractive returns on assets, both indicators of value creation. Having determined that customer satisfaction is persistently and predictively linked to returns on assets, the bank must now figure out which employee activities drive satisfaction.
Step 3: Identify the specific activities that employees can do to help achieve the governing objective. The goal is to make the link between your objective and the measures that employees can control through the application of skill. The relationship between these activities and the objective must also be persistent and predictive.
In the previous step, the bank determined that customer satisfaction drives value (it is predictive). The bank now has to find reliable drivers of customer satisfaction. Statistical analysis shows that the rates consumers receive on their loans, the speed of loan processing, and low teller turnover all affect customer satisfaction. Because these are within the control of employees and management, they are persistent. The bank can use this information to, for example, make sure that its process for reviewing and approving loans is quick and efficient.
Step 4: Evaluate your statistics. Finally, you must regularly reevaluate the measures you are using to link employee activities with the governing objective. The drivers of value change over time, and so must your statistics. For example, the demographics of the retail bank's customer base are changing, so the bank needs to review the drivers of customer satisfaction. As the customer base becomes younger and more digitally savvy, teller turnover becomes less relevant and the bank's online interface and customer service become more so.
Companies have access to a growing torrent of statistics that could improve their performance, but executives still cling to old-fashioned and often flawed methods for choosing metrics. In the past, companies could get away with going on gut and ignoring the right statistics because that's what everyone else was doing. Today, using them is necessary to compete. More to the point, identifying and exploiting them before rivals do will be the key to seizing advantage.
Saturday, February 14, 2015
We Share Success (WSS) giving away COMPANY SHARES
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Directors' Responsibilities - When Things Go Wrong
With the recent activity in high profile prosecutions of company directors by the Serious Fraud Office ("SFO"), McDonald Vague (Insolvency and Business Recovery Specialists) thought it opportune to revisit a case in which their firm was involved highlighting the point that it is not only the high profile directors that pay a heavy penalty when events do not go according to plan.
With the recent activity in high profile prosecutions of company directors by the Serious Fraud Office ("SFO"), McDonald Vague (Insolvency and Business Recovery Specialists) thought it opportune to revisit a case in which their firm was involved highlighting the point that it is not only the high profile directors that pay a heavy penalty when events do not go according to plan.
They pinpoint some useful tips for any person who may be considering taking on a governance role in a company for which they do not necessarily have all of the prerequisite skills or experience.
This case concerns a foreign exchange investment broker. The elements of the case involved fraud, breaches of directors' duties and ultimately the need to define the role and responsibilities of non-executive directors.
The defendant was a non-executive director in the company (by profession he was a medical practitioner). The defendant absolved all responsibilities to the executive director. He did however sign on behalf of the company, an employment contract, that required the executive director to report directly to him.
The defendant allowed the executive director to have sole charge of the running of the company, including being the only signatory to the cheque account. Directors' meetings were never held, no accounting records were ever maintained, no budgets or plans existed and segregation of duties were non-existent.
As a consequence, the executive director committed fraud whilst in charge of investors' funds. The defendant relied upon the executive director's "vast experience" which amounted to learning about Forex trading on a rugby trip.
No checks were made into the background of the executive director. If checks had been carried out, even the most basic of enquiry would have revealed that he had been involved in suspected fraudulent activities in South Africa.
As a consequence, the executive director faced seven counts of theft brought by the Serious Fraud Office in relation to these matters. The court in its judgment, found against the non-executive director for $300,000.
The message is clear for any person who may be considering taking on directorships involving companies in which they have no experience-:
- Be fully aware of the financial situation of the business at all times;
- Ensure basic controls are firmly in place
- Attend all board meetings;
- If they do not have experience, they must be prepared to find out;
- Seek advice where possible from experts in the industry;
- Understand the risks and rewards associated with the industry.
Unless you are prepared to take on these responsibilities and put in both the time and effort required you should either:
- Decline the directorship;
- Take out expensive insurance protection;
- Be prepared to face the extremely punitive consequences if things go pear shaped.
In conclusion, we are left with the opening statement of Justice J Venning:
"This case highlights the risk of a director becoming involved in a company whose business is outside the director's expertise. It also highlights the risk to investors who pursue high returns in speculative investments such as foreign exchange. It has led to loss by all parties concerned."
As an addendum to this article it is also pertinent to note that this case ultimately resulted in a successful prosecution by the SFO against the executive director, concluding with a term of imprisonment. This, however, was of little help to the non-executive director who ultimately paid the financial penalty.
Thursday, February 12, 2015
Small Business Start Up - Getting Ready
If you are considering launching your own business for the first time - congratulations! The first stages of small start up can feel exciting but also overwhelming. There is so much to learn, so much to do, so many decisions to make. Here is an overview to the first steps any potential new owner should take.
Evaluate yourself
Start by evaluating your strengths and weaknesses as a potential leader of a small business start up. The most successful leaders are, among other characteristics, creative, confident, visionary and persistent. This type of new venture is very risky and requires endless challenge. However, it also provides opportunities to learn, excitement and self-satisfaction.
Only you can evaluate whether you will be motivated enough by the benefits to deal with the downside. Without the drive to take on the responsibility and the stamina to endure it for the long haul, a business has more of a chance of being among the 50% that fail. The good news is that anyone can learn what it takes to be an entrepreneur if they are committed to doing so.
Ask for help
A small business start up is going to require an entire network to survive. From the family members closest to you, to the political decision makers in your state, your business will be impacted by a large number of connections. Make a commitment to reaching out to people. Don't be too proud to ask for assistance when it's needed. From finding a mentor, to asking for a loan to asking for sales, the process never ends. Unfortunately, this process also requires the ability to handle rejection.
An owner must also be capable of developing positive relationships with people from a variety of backgrounds. As they are the primary face of the company in the beginning, it's critical that their face be a positive one. This can be tricky when dealing with irritable customers or underperforming vendors.
Don't rush the process
The excitement of the small start up can be addicting. It's tempting to capitalize on this powerful emotion and get things moving as fast as possible. But the most successful entrepreneurs are those who commit themselves to exhaustive research, education and planning. They don't get bogged down and paralyzed by the process, rather they are able to effectively balance preparation with the capitalization of opportunity. This process is continuous; as the operations must be constantly re-evaluated as the business grows and expands.
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Wednesday, February 11, 2015
Succession Planning Is Important
A succession plan creates an expectation of the future, manages associated risks, and helps prevent any animosity amongst family members and other key stakeholders. Succession planning involves a number of interrelated items which need to be considered if the family business is going to be able to continue following the retirement or sudden unavailability of the owner or other key management personnel.
A succession plan creates an expectation of the future, manages associated risks, and helps prevent any animosity amongst family members and other key stakeholders. Succession planning involves a number of interrelated items which need to be considered if the family business is going to be able to continue following the retirement or sudden unavailability of the owner or other key management personnel.
The type of items which need to be considered in the development of a succession plan includes:
Monday, February 9, 2015
Marketing Your Business Online
If you are
not already marketing your business online, it is time to start. Although there
are a few exceptions, just about every business can benefit from online
marketing. There are just so many advantages to this type of marketing. First
of all, it is extremely affordable to market your business online. Other
advantages to marketing your business online include the ability to reach a
large target audience, the ability to reach potential customers all over the
world and the ability to customize the marketing for different sectors of the
target audience.
The
affordability of Internet marketing is one of many reasons why many business
owners are turning to the Internet for advertising. Advertising online is
incredibly affordable especially when you consider how many potential customers
a business owner can reach with an online marketing campaign. Most methods of
online advertising are quite affordable and some of them do not have any direct
costs. For example, you may choose to market your business online by
participating in industry forums and posting links to your website whenever it
is appropriate to do so. In this case the cost of creating and maintaining the
website is insignificant in comparison to the number of potential clients you
could reach through online marketing. Additionally, the costs associated with
posting links to your website are incidental. You could consider the cost of
having access to the Internet as part of the cost but you most likely require
Internet access for other reasons as well so it is completely worthwhile.
Reaching a
large target audience is another very worthwhile reason for marketing your
business online. You may have spent a great deal of time and energy doing
market research and determine who your target audience is. You may have also
spent a great deal of time trying to figure out the best way to reach this
audience. This is a very sound marketing principle but as it applies to
marketing on local television, radio and print media it only allows you to
reach a limited audience. However, when you take your marketing to the Internet
you automatically drastically increase your potential target audience because
you now have the ability to reach members of your target audience around the
world.
This
ability to reach customers around the world is another major advantage to
marketing your business online. Regardless of where you live and operate your
business, you have the ability to reach those who have an interest in the
products you sell or the services you provide no matter where they live. This
makes it possible for you to do business with customers around the world.
Likewise
the fact that the Internet is available 24 hours a day is also very beneficial
to those who choose to market their products or services online. Shopping for
products and services in person can be very difficult especially for
individuals who work long hours or those who work unusual hours. These working
conditions make it difficult for these individuals to do business and make
purchases of products and services they need during regular business hours.
However, business owners who have an online presence are much more convenient
because unlike stores and calling centers, the website never closes. This
convenience gives potential customers the ability to view products and
services, compare these products and services to the ones offered by
competitors and make a purchase at any hour of any day.
If you are a business
owner who is reading this article and you do not already have a strong online
presence, you need to immediately start learning more about the world of
Internet marketing. This is so important because if your competitors are
marketing online, you may find they are gaining a steady advantage and are
becoming more appealing to potential customers. Before too many of your
potential customers become loyal customers of the competition it is time to
start figuring out how you can market your business online and keep up with the
competition.
Thursday, February 5, 2015
10 Simple Steps to Exceptional Daily Productivity
A little planning, a little discipline... and a lot more gets done.
No matter what your job, in one way our days are basically the same: We all have the same amount of time at our disposal.
That's why how you use your time makes all the difference... whether you're bootstrapping a startup or running a billion-dollar company like Jim Whitehurst, the president and CEO of Red Hat, one of the largest and most successful providers of open-source software.
Here are Jim's tips for maximizing your time and improving your personal productivity:
1. Every Sunday night, map out your week. Sunday evenings, I sit down with my list of important objectives for the year and for each month. Those goals inform every week and help keep me on track. While long-range goals may not be urgent, they are definitely important. If you aren't careful, it's easy for "important" to get pushed aside by "urgent." Then I look at my calendar for the week. I know what times are blocked out by meetings, etc. Then I look at what I want to accomplish and slot those tasks onto my to-do list.
The key is to create structure and discipline for your week--otherwise you'll just let things come to you... and urgent will push aside important.
2. Actively block out task time. Everyone schedules meetings and appointments. Go a step further and block out time to complete specific tasks. Slot periods for "Write new proposal," or "Craft presentation," or "Review and approve marketing materials."
If you don't proactively block out that time, those tasks will slip. Or get interrupted. Or you'll lose focus. And important tasks won't actually get done.
3. Follow a realistic to-do list. I used to create to-do lists, but I didn't assign times to each task. What happened? I always had more items on my to-do list than I could accomplish, and that turned it into a wish list, not a to-do list. If you have six hours of meetings scheduled today and eight hours worth of tasks then those tasks won't get done.
Assigning realistic times forces you to prioritize. (I like Toodledo, but there are plenty of other tools you can use.) Assigning realistic times also helps you stay focused; when you know a task should only take 30 minutes you'll be more aggressive in weeding out or ignoring distractions.
4. Default to 30-minute meetings. Whoever invented the one-hour default in calendar software wasted millions of people-hours. Most subjects can be handled in 30 minutes. Many can be handled in 15 minutes--especially if everyone who attends knows the meeting is only going to last 15 minutes.
Don't be a slave to calendar tool defaults. Only schedule an hour if you absolutely know you need it.
5. Stop multitasking. During a meeting--especially an hour-long meeting--it's tempting to take care of a few mindless tasks. (Who hasn't cleaned up their inbox during a meeting?) The problem is that such split focus makes those meetings less productive. Even though you're only doing mindless stuff, still--you're distracted. And that makes you less productive.
Multitasking is a personal-productivity killer. Don't try to do two things partly well. Do one thing really well.
6. Obsess over leveraging edge time. My biggest down times during the workday when I drive to work, when I drive home, and when I'm in airports. So I focus really hard on how to use that time. I almost always schedule calls for my drive to work. It's easy: I take the kids to school and drop them off at a specific time; then I can do an 8.00 to 8.30 call. I typically don't schedule calls for the drive home so I can return calls, especially to people on the west coast.
At the airport, I use Pocket, a browser plugin that downloads articles. Loading up 10 articles ahead of time ensures I have plenty to read--plenty I want to read--while I'm waiting in the security line.
Look at your day. Identify the down times. Then schedule things you can do during that time. Call it edge time--because it really can build a productive edge.
7. Track your time. Once you start tracking your time (I use Toggl), you'll be amazed by how much time you spend doing stuff that isn't productive. You don't have to get hyper-specific. The info you log can be directional, not precise.
Tracking my time is something I just started to do recently. It's been an eye-opening experience--and one that has really helped me focus.
8. Be thoughtful about lunch. Your lunch can take an hour. Or 30 minutes. Or 10 minutes.
Whatever time it takes, be thoughtful about what you do. If you like to eat at your desk and keep chugging, fine. But if you benefit from using the break to recharge, lunch is one time where multitasking can be great: You can network, socialize, and help build your company's culture--but not if you're going out to lunch with the same people every day.
Pick two days a week to go out with people you don't know well. Or take a walk. Or do something personally productive. Say you take an hour for lunch each day; that's five hours a week. Be thoughtful about how you spend that time. You don't have to work, but you should make it work for you.
9. Protect your family time. Like you, I'm a bit of a workaholic. So I'm very thoughtful about my evenings. When I get home from work, it's family time: we have dinner as a family, we help our kids with their homework. I completely shut down. No phone, no email.
Generally speaking we have two hours before the kids have to get ready for bed. During that time, I'm there. Then I can switch back on. I'm comfortable leaving work at 5 or 5:30 p.m. because at 8 or 9 o'clock, I know I will be able to re-engage with work.
Every family has peak times when they can best interact. If you don't proactively free up that time you'll slip back into work stuff. Either be working or be home with your family. That means no phones at the table, no texts. Don't just be there, be with your family.
10. Start every day right. I exercise first thing in the morning because exercise is energizing. (Research also shows that moderate aerobic exercise can improve your mood for up to 12 hours, too.)
I get up early and run. Then I cool off while I read the newspaper and am downstairs before my kids so I can eat breakfast with them. Not only will you get an energy boost, efficiency in the morning sets the stage for the rest of your day. Start your day productively and your entire day will be more productive, too.
Wednesday, February 4, 2015
Cara Mudah Meningkatkan Jualan
Kita
tidak semestinya perlu mengeluarkan kos untuk promosi bagi meningkatkan
jualan. Ada banyak cara lain untuk meningkatkan penjualan tanpa
memerlukan kos tambahan.
Perkara pertama yang harus dilakukan adalah meningkatkan keyakinan
diri pekerja Anda. Keyakinan meningkatkan produktiviti. Jika pekerja
merasa yakin dengan masa depannya, mereka akan bertugas dengan lebih
baik. Memang betul, Anda tidak akan sentiasa dapat menjamin pekerjaan
seseorang, dan sepatutnya tidak lansung; tetapi Anda boleh mengambil
satu langkah yang dapat meningkatkan keyakinan diri mereka dengan
perniagaan dan komitmen pengurusan untuk mereka yang mempunyai potensi.
Selepas itu, berikan kepada pekerja yang terbaik anda tugas sebagai
pemimpin. Ciri-ciri pemimpin yang berjaya dalam kelompok penjualan
adalah mereka yang dapat mengembangkan cara-cara terbaik bagi mereka dan
bertindak sebagai pembimbing atau pelatih anggota pasukan penjualan
yang lain.
Pemimpin harus diberi ganjaran hasil penggunaan pelbagai teknik
penjualan terbaik yang mereka praktikkan, dan anggota pasukan lain harus
dapat menerima cadangan-cadangan untuk meningkatkan penjualan mereka.
Bukan itu saja, Anda juga harus menaikkan semangat pasukan penjualan.
Sebuah pasukan penjualan yang bersemangat tinggi akan sentiasa tampak
lebih unggul daripada yang lain. Semangat pasukan yang tinggi adalah
hasil daripada pengurusan yang baik
================================================
LEGENDA JUTAWAN
Monday, February 2, 2015
Take Care of Yourself
By Michele Weiner-Davis
Today I want to write about topic that I think is so important as you are working on improving your marriage. Too many people work so hard at getting things right with their spouses, that that's their only focus. They lose concentration at work. They lose interest in friends and engaging in pleasurable activities. Sometimes they forget to eat or they eat too much. Becoming a couch potato isn't all that uncommon.
If any of this sounds familiar to you, I want you to think about something very important. While you're working hard to turn things around in your marriage, you really need to take good care of yourself. You need to shine a light on self care by asking yourself, "What have I done recently to keep myself healthy physically, emotionally and spiritually?"
If you have a hard time answering this question, you will undoubtedly feel drained, depressed, unhappy, anxious and lifeless. You are probably ignoring important people in your life. You will challenge your immune system and dull your zest for life. And, in so doing, you are also lessening the chances that your spouse will see in you the wonderful, spirited person you really are. So, it's time for a change.
Starting tomorrow, promise yourself that you will make you a bigger priority. Get off the couch and exercise. Do it every day. Research has shown that exercise can be as effective as antidepressants for people who are feeling down or even clinically depressed. Make sure your exercise is aerobic. Pay more attention to breathing deeply. Deep breaths are calming. I'm sure you could use a sense of peace in your life. And while you're calming yourself down, yoga and meditation have proven to be effective methods for reducing stress and increasing a sense of well-being. There are classes wherever you go. And if you don't like the idea of taking a class, you can learn how to meditate right at home...even in your p.j.'s. Or get a yoga DVD at the grocery store or library. There's no excuse for sitting still or pacing nervously. Do something constructive. If you're eating too much or too little, don't give yourself permission to continue this unhealthful habit. Nourish your body sensibly. Eating right fortifies your strength and your spirit. And don't forget a massage. It will fill up your senses.
Some people have told me that they find peace in keeping journals. If you're the writing sort, pull out a notebook and start writing your feelings. Do it every day. Writing can be incredibly healing.
If you are a people-oriented person but the mood to be with others hasn't been striking you lately, push yourself out the door. Remind yourself that there is a world outside of your current uncomfortable situation. It will be good for your soul and your self-esteem.
If you are spiritual, make sure you spend some quiet time in prayer. You will find solace in your faith.
Okay, you might be saying to yourself, "I know all of this stuff Michele is writing about, it's common sense." But I will tell you that, in my experience, when people get stressed out, they often stop being loving to themselves. I just want to remind you that you deserve love. Even if things are really tough at home, you still deserve to be cared for and cherished. If you're not getting this from your spouse right now, you need to do it for yourself. Just consider this message a gentle reminder to be nice to you.
And finally, if talking things out helps you clear your head and feel more centered, call a friend or relative to whom you haven't spoken in a long time. Or if you feel that your situation is too personal, consider talking to a Divorce Busting coach who can help you feel better about yourself and approach your life and your marriage more proactively.
Whatever you decide to do, do it tomorrow (or today!). Better times are right around the corner..
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